Roofing

What's it like to get a new roof in Sacramento or Folsom? Hopefully it won't turn out like this...

Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself… Where the h*ll is my roof?

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

I walked into a store and I pointed a stick to the roof and i said"this is a stick up"

Did you hear the one about the roofer with a perfect safety record? He never had a shingle accident.

If you're looking for a relationship, become a roofer. You're bound to find hot shingles in your area

I was recently telling a story about a guy that worked for me many years ago when I was in my early 20's doing sub work on new homes and wounderd just how many crazy things has been seen in the roofing buziness?

This was in the winter on a 9/12 pitch and we needed to sweep the snow off when we got there. The house was a two story that was on a hill which scared the heck out of you when looking down. I told the guys to find a way to tie off in case they went sliding. The guy took a steal cable and tied it off to his waist (with nothing to protect him from the thin cable) and ran around on this cut up roof like a monkey. A vending truck came buy and we decided to get a coffee and when he climbed down he had about 6 feet of cable left!

Back then safety wasn't a big issue, at least not to my young @#!! If you fell off the roof you were fired before you hit the ground and re-hired if you could go right back to work.

Had a friend in Peoria, big roofing contractor, he hired a new sub crew, gave them the address, on and off 2 days tops, he told them he would check on them about noon.

At noon he went to the job, nobody there, he began to get pissed and went to the truck for his cell phone. While sitting in the truck on the cell phone he noticed the crews truck about a block down.

You guessed it........The maggots tore off the wrong roof.